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[AISLING EUGENIE DOLOHOV]

look at the mess that we've made we pick ourselves undone July 5th, 2023 Alistair, You've gone for so long, Alistair. And sometimes, I forget that you cannot come back anymore, until Father reminds me of the cold hard truth that you're gone - for good. He never lets me believe that you are watching over me from heaven and he says it is a stupid thing to believe in heaven when I am living in hell. But I still believe, Alistair. I know heaven is a very beautiful place where good people will go to when they die. It's a shame that I probably will not get a chance to meet you there, Alistair, because I have just sent someone to hell today. The filthy muggleborn witch who pushed you to death two years ago has been turned into dust just a couple hours ago. She died very peacefully and Father had come up with an idea of making the whole thing look like a suicide – just like yours. You never thought I could decently perform Imperius curse, did you? You can go to her house to check if you want. Don't be disappointed if you see her dead body hung in her room with a silken rope. Worry not, I did not get my hands stained with blood as she did everything by herself. Poor girl, she was to be a ministry worker after this summer. But it served her right for what she did. “An eye for an eye”, and in our case it is “blood for blood”. That girl, she was just one name on an endless list. So rest in peace, Alistair. I will give you justice, which those feckless law enforcers could not. You should be proud of me, brother. Father said that he was very proud of me and that I was going to be something great and everybody would stand whenever I walked by. And I told myself that I was doing the right thing. I should feel proud about myself. I should. And I am. So don't worry about me or the wet thing that is running down my face. It was just something got into my eyes. Because of it, my eyes has been ridiculoudly watery since I found myself at the doorstep of the Reinhardt's home after having watched the girl breathed her last breath. I wanted Drew to know that I was no longer a child or an innocent and vulnerable little girl he had known years ago. He should be aware that I can take care of myself – I have always taken care of myself. But I knew he would not be convinced, given tears did not stop welling up my eyes. Who would burst into tears after getting her vengeance? That arrogant idiot would not have believed if I had told him it was tears of joy. So I left. It's funny when I cannot think of anyone other than Drew to tell them about my great achievement. Xochilt would listen if I told her. And after that? I don't know. Would she give me a hug and tell me that she was happy for me? Or would she run as fast as she could to get away from me? What about Charlie, Xarrah, Oliver, Icarus and Jason? They probably would do the same, if not something worse. You think I am a psycho like Father, don't you? You were so much like Mother. Both of you have such a strange habit of leaving and never coming back. So don't judge me or accuse me of being cruel. You are the cruel one to have left me when I needed you the most. Both of you.

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[AISLING EUGENIE DOLOHOV]

look at the mess that we've made we pick ourselves undone August 30th, 2023 The reasons why you love Charlie He is taller than you. He likes to hug you so tightly that you can't breathe. He listens to your rambling without yawning. He laughs even thought your joke is not funny. He would never tell you that he hates your cookies which you spent hours to make, if you ever made them. (sadly you don't even know how to make cookies).  His favorite song is your favorite song, too. He doesn't ask for permission to kiss you. He blushes after he kisses you. He always walks you to classes even though you don't ask him to. He knows you like dark chocolate and green tea whereas most people think you like milk chocolate and pineapple juice (you hate pineapple, it makes your tongue hurt). He smells like dark chocolate and green tea. He calls you Aisling instead of "the granddaughter of the psycho Antonin Dolohov". He showed you that cool music player and will show you how to download music when you come over his home at Christmas. He assures you that nothing he shows you will bite you. He doesn't think your childish enthusiasm is stupid. He always takes your hand first. He has a Welsh accent. On your first date, he just grinned when you seemingly tried to imply how dangerous you were. He doesn't mind being the only sober Hufflepuff among a bunch of crazy Ravenclaws (so much like Xochilt). Why are you even listing these things?

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[AISLING EUGENIE DOLOHOV]

look at the mess that we've made we pick ourselves undone October, 2023 The ball is over. A lot of things are over. Drew Reinhardt, Is it a habit of yours? Hurting people? You do take great joy in seeing their worlds falling apart, don't you? You like to push them to their breaking point so they will destroy themselves and save you from doing it yourself. You like to make them feel like their lives were nothing if not a mistake. You feed on their pain and sorrow, don't you? What are you, Drew? And more importantly, what are we? I thought we were friends. I wish we had been friends. Apparently, we are not. Your ridiculously stupid pureblood pride had blinded you. What else do you see in a person aside from their blood status, Drew? You hate the people that you don't even know. What have they done to you? What have I done to deserve all of this? You have no idea how painful it was to look at your best friend but not know who she was anymore. You have no idea how painful it was to see the person you loved so much getting hurt because of you and there was nothing you could do about it. I'm not dauntless likes you always expect me to be. Death does not cause my insecurity, but losing them does. Charlie and Xochilt, they were all I have in this world. I guess I'm being stupid now. What am I doing? Expecting you will have some sympathy for me and my friends? Yours is a heart of stone. I surrender, Drew. I will not fight you any longer. You've won. I will never come near Charlie Valdez again. I will stay away from the people you don't like. So please, I beg of you. Stay away from me. I don't think there's any part of me that is still whole for you to break.

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