This is love, this is hell -- Charlie

[ICARUS ALAWN LUGUBELENUS]

Icarus had finally asked Xochilt out, after years of being enamored and entranced with the red head he had dug deep within himself to find the nerve it took to ask her out. Foolishly he had hoped it would be like some love story, that for some reason she would have gone with him where she would realize how right for her he was. Too bad this was real life. He trudged the halls and stair cases, putting as much distance between himself and the ghost of what just happened on the astronomy tower. Icarus couldn't go to Ravenclaw tower, not like this. His friends would be waiting, expecting something that he couldn't tell them.

It hurt. He hurt. Right now there was only one person Icarus wanted to see. While he loved the few friend he had, Charlie had been his rock. It was Charlie who kept Icarus from falling too deep into despair after his mother's death. He was the one who talked him through countless panic attacks over the years. They were brothers, there for each other no matter what. Icarus didn't need a friend right now, he needed a brother. So he let his feet guide him down the halls into the sub-level of the castle. Icarus lingered near the entrance to the Hufflepuff common room, slouched against the wall.

He'd made a fool of himself asking Xochilt out. The longer he sat alone the more he realized this. Charlie and Oliver had been so confident that asking Xochilt out was the right thing - Icarus guessed when things went favorably it seemed like it could work for anyone. Anyone by him. He pushed his hands up his face and into his dark hair, grabbing it at the root and pulling. He wanted to scream. He wanted to cry. All these years, and he blew it.

Good news, that was what he was meant to be able to tell everyone when he returned. Its not like they didn't know today was the day he was going to do it. He'd been so obvious even if he thought he was being subtle. But everyone knew him, they could read him like a book. Well, there was no good news to share. He and Xochilt would never be the new couple of the group. There would be no double dates to the village there would only be pathetic looks of sympathy. Maybe he was just worked up, maybe none of that was true, but Icarus couldn't help thinking it. Over thinking it. Over thinking everything.

Before he went completely out of his mind Icarus caught sight of Charlie returning to his house. Icarus was on his feet in no time, he closed the distance between himself and Charlie. For a moment Icarus just stared at his best friend with a face riddled with emotion, but he threw an arm behind his friend's neck and around his shoulders and pulled himself closer. Most their affection was playful. it'd been some time since Icarus had been this upset. He hugged Charlie tightly, he didn't even know where to start or even what to say. He just felt so stupid. So bloody stupid. It hurt though. It hurt and it seemed like Charlie was the only one who was going to know how to make it stop.

ooc: I couldn't help myself I'm sorry.

CHARLIE GABRIEL VALDEZ

[CHARLIE GABRIEL VALDEZ]

Charlie had a long day. It wasn't a bad day just a long day. He'd been brushing up on any possible knowledge that he'd need for the tasks for the Hogwarts Tournament. Ellen and himself were going to make a good team, or at least he hoped so and in the end he hoped that this wouldn't turn out to be like the Triwizard Tournament so many years ago when a Hufflepuff Student, Cedric Diggory, died.

He'd swung into the Great Hall for some leftover dinner but then again he could have just stopped by the kitchens and gotten some delicious food. That was a perk of being in Hufflepuff you were just down the hallway from the kitchens, you could just go down anytime you wanted, well if you didn't mind the two minutes where you could be caught or the risk of a professor being in the kitchens. All the Hufflepuffs knew about tickling the pear though to get in, it was just one those things you learned over the years.

After he got a few things to eat and snacked a bit his eyes scanned the Great Hall. It clicked to him that his best friend, no that wasn't strong enough of a word, his brother Icarus was supposed to be asking out Xochilt Ollivander and he wanted to know how that went. There was no Icarus at the Ravenclaw table. A frown came to his face. He could go down to his house and finish Icarus in the morning and figure out what happened. After all if it went well Icarus was probably spending time with Xochilt. He stood up and made his way down to the Hufflepuff Basement. As he reached the hallways leading towards the common room his eyes landed on Icarus. He was just about to ask him how it went when Icarus came over quite quickly and wrapped his arms around himself. Charlie moved his arms around Icarus carefully.

His friend didn't say a word and Charlie just held him. ”I take it that it didn't go well?” he asked softly. It did make Charlie happy that his friend would come see him first. That was a very good feeling. But he'd let Icarus actually do the talking when he was ready. There was no way that Icarus had to ever feel like telling him something that he didn't want to. But they were best friends and Charlie could easily change the subject to something like the tournament if need be.

Words: 420
Tagged: ICARUS ALAWN LUGUBELENUS
Notes: I'm glad you made it!

[ICARUS ALAWN LUGUBELENUS]

There was a safety that Icarus felt in Charlie's arms. What a sight they must have been were anyone to see. Still Icarus held tight to the hufflepuff and choked down his emotions. "You could say that." Icarus' voice was raw. Icarus let Charlie free of his grasp and looked upon the young man with a brief look of gratitude. There were few people who Icarus could feel so comfortable with. No doubt he would be at a loss with out Charlie.

Icarus wanted to gush the day from start to finish right then and there to Charlie but, he restrained himself. Charlie didn't need the whole day. Icarus sighed and ran a hand through his hair as he tried to sort out his words in his head. "I asked her to stay after Astronomy...stars and romance you know -" His mouth felt dry and he had to ruffle up the top of his hair as he looked away from Charlie, "I gave her one of my stupid origami roses...I just...I made and utter arse of myself!" Icarus' voice held a light tone of frustration. He was frustrated with himself. Frustrated about how it'd gone. Frustrated that he let her go. He had her in his arms and he let her go.

He chewed at the inside of his cheek, he could still taste the blood from chewing it raw. "She...she said she needed time to decide..." A lot of people would take that over a no, but to Icarus, well it'd felt all too good to be true. She'd stayed like he asked. She'd seemed impressed by his stupid little paper rose. Just why would she go with him? He was a bloody idiot to have thought he was ever going to have a chance.

"I don't think she's going to say yes mate...I think she just didn't know how to say no." Icarus bit at his lip and looked back to Charlie. "The worst part....the worst part of it all is I let her go. I had her in my arms and I just let her go. How - just....." Icarus pressed his palms to his eyes and groaned. "Who does that? Who just lets the girl of their dreams slip through their arms after they've kissed them? I have got to be the stupidest man alive." The words just spilled out. He wasn't mad at Xochilt. He was mad at himself.

CHARLIE GABRIEL VALDEZ